Tag Archives: healthy

Betrayed

29 Mar

“For the Son of Man must die, as the Scriptures declared long ago. But how terrible it will be for the one who betrays him. It would be far better for that man if he had never been born. “ Mark 14:21 NLT

Wow! This jumped off the page from my devotional.
This passage is one small one from a very powerful chapter. The Last Supper. I have thought about this all day.  I discussed this with a couple of wise friends.
Easter is such a powerful, redemptive, hope-filled, thoughtful time. What better time is there to discuss the importance of salvation? I am going to do my best to share my thoughts on this during this Holy Maunday Thursday

My first thought is this: Our lives are mapped out long before we are born. God creates each of us. Judas was created, for his purpose. His purpose was to betray Our Lord.

It is so hard for me to think that some people are not called. Some people just live in this world and never go to heaven. We want to think that everyone does. It’s painful to really sit and think there was a disciple bound for the Lake of Fire for all eternity.
Jesus said in Matthew 7:13-14 “You can enter God’s Kingdom only through the narrow gate. The highway to hell is broad, and it’s gate is wide for the many who choose that way. But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few ever find it.”
In Luke 13:24, he said “ Work hard to enter the narrow door to God’s Kingdom, for many will try to enter but will fail.

My second observation is this: Jesus loved Judas. He knew he would betray him and loved him, his enemy, as the perfect example for us.

It isn’t enough to just say it,  you must love the Lord with all your heart and also, you must love your neighbor as yourself.

This includes the Judas in your life. Yes, even your Judas.  Jesus loved Mary and he loved Judas. There is just no other word’s to say about that.

In my wish to see all things be loving and wonderful  and everyone to be blessed and know Jesus, even those that have harmed me; In my heart that is more jaded, more cautious, (I am still me under it all), this heart absolutely loves people and breaks to think of anyone going to hell.

I hope there is a time for all before that time, in that time where every knee will bow,that maybe there is an opportunity for redemption.  Judas knew who Jesus was and I pray he repented before he took his life.

If not, then his whole  purpose was to know Jesus, to betray him, but never to be with Him in heaven. This breaks my heart, even as I trust God with wisdom and knowledge and compassion I can’t begin to know.

Lord, let me never forget and always remember, You loved me before I ever repented. You loved your enemies and those that would betray you. You are the lover of our souls Lord, help us to love our Judas’ as much as we love our Mary’s.  Amen. 

 

 

A New Song

16 Apr

Sunshine upon my face, the raindrops have gone away
It feels so good to be free
With You I’ve found a way, to overcome all the things
That hold me down, that keep me down away from You
~Caleb Rowden

Another plane, another journey.

As I listen to my music on this flight, I reflect on the many flights I would spend with my head pressed against the window, tears streaming down my face. It was dreaded quiet time, forced time in my head, a place I spent as little time as possible in that season.

Reflecting as lyrics of praise lift me up and fill me with my now ever present peace; I realize music has always been here, season to season, from sad songs to dance. These days my genre of choice is christian music, which also reflects where my mind is at these days.

What a journey this has been. What a ride the past 6 years have been. Broken to new, lost to so sure, sorrow to joy.

My heart was broken back then. I had no love in my life. Not even for myself.
How great is the love I found in that loveless state? Crazier still is that I found the Love of all Loves when I fell in Love with Jesus.

To be sure, the journey was still mine to walk, the valleys were still there and I had to walk through them. But! He brought such amazing friendships to walk beside me. Some to challenge me, some to teach me and some to encourage me. The deeper I went in my faith, the deeper those God-inspired friendships went, teaching me about abandon, trust and faith.

Though I knew His greatness and power, though I had walked through great darkness at times only to be so incredibly blessed on the other side. Though I could literally feel the Holy Spirit beside me at time…I still forgot. I still panicked, still doubted.

What I never want to forget is that during the hardest moments, that is when I knew He was beside me; I grew so calm during the hardest moments in my walk. Music is a great reminder. A song can take me back to a place. Like now.

I find it inspiring to look back, to see what I have walked through, how God’s faithfulness never ceases and He fulfills every promise. People cannot do that. We are just not perfect enough.

I didn’t become better, or righteous, I simply surrendered it all; My hurt, my sense of failure, my lack of hope, my disappointment in people, my self-sufficiency, my self-blame and self loathing. I was empty.

It was then that I was able to let go and let God begin to change me. Not the people around me, not my circumstances, not give me everything I wanted but to change the way I saw the world, change the way I processed life and emotion, change my awareness.

I began to have moments of super natural understanding, which goes so much deeper than anything I could do myself.

My sinful nature is still with me. Certain sin fell away when love replaced the destructive lies. I believe without our sin, we would forget our need for humility and Christ. We will never be able to be sinless. Only He could do that.

Singing a new song, listening to a new genre, there are no more tears on planes. There is no fear. There is hope. I am not always happy, but I am always hopeful. Life is really hard at times, but this is temporary. A drop in the bucket of eternity and the fulfillment of the greatest promise ever!

That’s my song from here on out.

Psalm 96
1 Sing to the Lord a new song;
sing to the Lord, all the earth.
2 Sing to the Lord, praise his name;
proclaim his salvation day after day.

More Than Love

29 Jan

Deciding whether to commit to or to end a relationship is a serious, but important question that anyone that has ever been in a relationship has to ask. This can be so difficult and honestly, requires many decisions, not just a broad question of do I love Him/Her.

Not asking the hard questions is not only irresponsible, it is dangerous. You may love someone, but commitment is far more than love. There are certain things to consider that may help in making the best decision.

When someone hurts us, we naturally want to share our hurt with someone but be choosy and think long and hard before you overshare your concerns with those that love you most. While you may get over what someone does, they may not. This can be unwise as it may slant any future decision making advice you may need from those that know you best.

A Pastor, a counselor, a couple you respect, with no emotional tie to you, would be a great place to start when seeking advise about concerns you may have, any fears or issues that may keep you from taking the next step towards or away from your partner.

Pray, Pray, Pray!

Do NOT skip this step. Talk to God. He is the most objective listener. Lay your heart and your future at His feet and sleep on it for a while. Give God your time. Spend time in the word. Pour your thoughts out to Him. Pray for discernment and wisdom, (HIS), then be quiet and allow Him to answer you. Do not be impatient. Let Him work on your heart or let him guide your wisdom. He will.

Take time to do your lists. Like prayer, do NOT skip this step.

First be general and just start writing down anything you love, like, dislike, or feel may be a red flag. Then rate them as a pro, con, good quality or area of concern.
Then, go deeper…Dig deep and be completely transparent and honest with yourself. Take everything into consideration. Does he/she bring positive or negative consequences or concerns in the areas of career, finances, faith, personality,are they positive or negative, if you are raising children, what are the concerns and consequences of behaviors or personalities with your children: How will this affect your lifestyle, your hobbies, community involvements, alone time. What are the potential lifestyle changes, will they add to or detract from your life. *note: do this when you are not upset, and not when you are high in love. Do this when you are able to truly be open and objective with yourself.

You should have a clear idea forming of what your concerns are and what you can let go of. I feel I must clarify this here. If you have been in abusive or unhealthy relationships in the past, take your list to a professional. Make sure you are not making choices out of habit, overlooking or not ranking a red flag, a red flag. Sadly, when we make those mistakes over and over, we have to take the bull by the horn and seek a professional to advocate for us until we are strong and sure of our own ability to advocate for ourselves.

Where there are behaviors that are red flags, and you choose to move forward, then you must write out clear and concise rules of engagement, a clear boundary of behavior that is acceptable and behavior that is not and concise consequences for behavior that is not healthy.

Behaviors that suggest a need for a clear and defined boundary/consequence are abuse of any kind, cheating, drugs,alcohol, gambling, porn. Set the boundary, and if they cannot abide by the contract, you cannot overlook or make exceptions. You must decide to end the relationship and put that in writing as the consequence. Then you BOTH need to abide by the rules.

Finally, Let go of what doesn’t matter. The best part about making a deep list is that you seek wisdom, discernment, with open and objective analysis. Make a logical decision that just may go against your emotion or your feelings for someone. If you find the good far outweighs the bad, then you have your answer. If you find the bad outweighs the good, then you have your answer. If you find it is somewhere in between, you have to explore, ask questions, set boundaries and seek help to make your decision.

Love is not enough and love will not sustain a poorly thought out, bad relationship. The level of success in your relationships depends greatly on your willingness to be honest and thoughtful about who you choose to commit yourself to.

Before You Go

5 Aug

If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.~ Mark 3:25 NIV

The Church family, like a safe marriage will go through times that simply don’t make us “happy”. I pray that you look within yourselves for the source of that unhappiness before you act on that feeling. In quitting a thing…there is a huge piece of the pie missing. Commitment.

First of all, marriage and church is meant to help us stumble along the journey to become Holy. To mature and grow in our faith and relationship with God. To prepare us to be the Bride/Groom of Christ in Heaven.

Do your interactions and actions towards a solution match your level of energy spent in your unhappiness. (It is important to add that God never intended for people to be abused in a marriage or a church so I want that clear…People need to be safe, in those instances, leave.)

Commitment is something that isn’t about feeling “happy”. It is change and it is boring, it is arguing and crying and loving and liking and giving and refusing to give another inch sometimes. It is laughing and watching and talking and barely speaking. It is human and it is forgiving. It is about staying when it’s tough.

It is about the whole, not the moments. It’s about seeing who we are supposed to be, where we need to grow, where we need to accept and give Grace and Mercy to one another. It is about agreeing to disagree sometimes as long as it is biblical truth. It is forbearance,because we are all so fallible.

It isn’t about the immediate. It is about building a thing. Starting with foundation. Sometimes you need to rebuild the foundation to get it strong again. You may not always want to be somewhere, but commitment is a promise that gets you through to the other side. To another plateau of enriched learning and growth. To new joy and acceptance. Today, most people leave at the most important parts and never fully understand the blessing of working it out.

If you are led in a different direction, if you are not being “fed” at church, happy in your marriage, there are many questions you need to pray about, and seek answers to.

God is very specific about speaking against and dividing a church. I am not a fan of divorce and neither is God.

There are great reasons to leave a church. I am linking several great articles. I encourage you to read, pray, seek to rectify. Honor your commitment or at best, evaluate your commitment.

Romans 12:3
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.

1 Corinthians 4:17
For this reason I have sent to you Timothy, my son whom I love, who is faithful in the Lord. He will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church.

1 Corinthians 10:32
Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God–

1 Corinthians 11:16
If anyone wants to be contentious about this, we have no other practice–nor do the churches of God.

1 Corinthians 11:34
Anyone who is hungry should eat something at home, so that when you meet together it may not result in judgment. And when I come I will give further directions.

1 Corinthians 14:33
For God is not a God of disorder but of peace–as in all the congregations of the Lord’s people.

2 Corinthians 8:18
And we are sending along with him the brother who is praised by all the churches for his service to the gospel.

2 Corinthians 11:28
Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches.

Galatians 1:22
I was personally unknown to the churches of Judea that are in Christ.

1 Thessalonians 2:14
For you, brothers and sisters, became imitators of God’s churches in Judea, which are in Christ Jesus: You suffered from your own people the same things those churches suffered from the Jews

2 Thessalonians 1:4
Therefore, among God’s churches we boast about your perseverance and faith in all the persecutions and trials you are enduring.

http://www.churchleaders.com/pastors/pastor-articles/148839-how-to-leave-a-church-well
http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/kevindeyoung/2010/07/23/good-reasons-for-moving-on